Canada must be out of potatoes. Maybe we fished them into extinction like the once mighty cod. Maybe we hunted them down and blasted them into oblivion like the once thundering herds of wild buffalo that covered the western prairies. Maybe we ate so many French fries in July our once plentiful supplies have dried up, disappeared, died.
Whatever the case, Costco is now selling giant tubs of red potato salad distributed by Reser’s Fine Foods, Beaverton. But not as in ‘Beaverton, Ontario, Canada’ but as in ‘Beaverton, Oregon, US of A.’
Good grief.
As if the fact my wife buys potato salad in tubs the size of a small nation isn’t disturbing enough.
How can I even look into the fridge for something to snack on before lunch without feeling the overwhelming pressure to eat a bit more potato salad - it will last forever, otherwise - even though we had it for supper last night, supper the night before that and lunch a few hours before that?
Sure, Canadians love a deal. Potato salad in 20 pound drums for $1.99, who wouldn’t love it? Who wouldn’t buy extra and ask to store it in the neighbour’s freezer for the next family reunion or when a football team - for some unknown reason - comes for dinner?
But the pressure!
["I've got to get to the bottom of this.": photos GH]
And now... Canada is out of potatoes and we have to ship in salad from Oregon, US of A. Now I have to struggle to look past or around a giant tank of potato salad - from some far off state - when trying to find a smidgen of mustard for my gourmet hotdog that’s sitting on the kitchen counter getting colder by the second.
When we finally reach the bottom of this container, I’m going to ask my wife to forget the next deal on potato salad ($1.99 for 50 pounds is surely just around the corner) so I don’t have to face the daily pressure of eating more than I need for one lifetime and so the US of A doesn’t run out of potatoes as well.
It’s bad enough that Canada is out of potatoes.
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