Recommended Reading: Elmore Leonard’s 10 Rules of Writing - Rule 5

In his recent book Elmore keeps his rules short.

His descriptions and reasons are short as well.

In fact, 100 per cent of my posts about his rules are 3 miles longer than the rules.


I’ll work on that as I try to incorporate his 10 rules into my most recent short story.

Rule 5. Keep your exclamation points under control

Elmore’s reason?

“You are allowed no more than two or three per 100,000 words of prose.”

Though I’m sure this is no arbitrary rule carved in stone inside the Hall of Famous American Literature I tend to agree with him on this one.

And I would say do the same with commas.

Keep them both under control because punctuation interrupts the flow and once I get the flow going I don’t like to stop and send people off into some kind of mental speed wobble.

My short story now continues without any exclamation points:


It was mid-afternoon and the sun was hotter than hell.

I felt as if a hole was being drilled through the back of my neck with a pick ax.

At the same time the woman who had just backed into my motorcycle was drilling a hole into my forehead with a stare so cold I swore my whole body was immersed in ice, except for the back of my neck.

“Git out your wallet,” I said.

After spitting onto the hot tarmac next to her red spiked heels I said, “You scratched the paint and I don’t care what you say to me - you pay up today.”

She said, “You jerk. How do you know it was me?”

“I was having coffee right in there when you knocked it over,” I said.

I pointed to my mug and notebook on the table inside the coffee shop window a few feet away.

“If I hadn’t run out and stepped in front of your car you would have been outta here.”

Her hands didn’t budge from her hips and she continued to look at me as if I was shit on her shoes.

“I’m sure I didn’t hit it hard enough to knock it over,” she said.

“Then why did you get out of your car while I was lifting it back up?”

I took a step into her personal space and thought I saw her flinch.


“You weren’t going to give me a hand were you?” I asked.

The cold look in her eyes dropped about 20 degrees and she shifted her stance.

She looked past my shoulder and said, “Your bike’s okay then.”

I looked back at it.


“Sure,” I said. “I can get it home. But it needs some touch up and time is money.”

She got cocky as soon as I said ‘money’.

Two hundred dollar red spikes on her pretty little feet and she acted hostile about reaching into her wallet for me.

She took two quick steps around me and closer to the bike.

“My last boy friend had a bike like yours and had twenty cans of paint in his garage for scratches. What about you?”

Shit, I said to myself. She wants to haggle.

***

Any thoughts about Elmore’s 10 rules or my brilliant short story so far?

Click here to visit Elmore Leonard’s website.

You will find my thoughts about Rule 4 at this location.

Or visit my archives for Recommended Reading: Elmore Leonard’s 10 Rules of Writing - Rules 1 through 4 for more context.

[I like short rules and context.]

*