[This brilliant column was originally published in November, 2002 in The Londoner. You may wish to read PT 1 for context. Go ahead. I’ll wait.]
Cold coffee and hot on the trail of the elusive email
When I picked up the phone I noticed the line was busy. Someone had left a message. I dialed our message-waiting service, punched in the password and went through the process of listening to three new messages. I saved two, erased one, hung up.
I patiently went back to the computer, took a sip of lukewarm coffee and began the task of checking for email again. I was informed that I couldn’t get email - the phone line was busy once more.
While I had been listening to the three phone messages someone else had called, encountered a busy signal on our phone, and left a message.
Back to the phone I went, humbly dragging my feet, coffee in hand.
For a second time I dialed our message service, quickly tapped in the password and went through the process of listening half-heartedly to the latest message.
I made a mental note or two, erased the message, and hung up.
“Call Sears when you have a minute,” I said to Pat, as I shuffled toward the back of the house again.
“What did they want?” Pat asked.
“Something about an item arriving from Montreal,” I said.
“Great. Thanks. By the way, what are you doing?” she asked.
I answered, “I’m getting messages.”
She asked, “Is it easier with the new computer?”
I could have laughed. Or cried.
[Cartoon link]
I was getting a message all right, just not the one I wanted. And by the time I had returned to our computer for the third time to begin the process of collecting email Pat was talking to a lovely lady at Sears.
Shut out again. I took a sip of cold coffee and lowered my head to the keyboard.
I connected with the email service later on the same day when I was in a better mood.
There was no email.
***
Please click here to read PT 1 Cold coffee and hot on the trail
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