Tuesday, January 5, 2010

It Strikes Me Funny: Does Horatio Caine have animal attraction?

I’m sixty, I’m male, and fashion pages strike me funny.

Admittedly, I’m not the target audience Heather T. (GLAM, London Free Press) is hoping to luxe up with fashion bling -- my gosh, I’ve got to stop using those words! -- and her opening line in the TODAY section proves it beyond a shadow of a doubt:

If you’re looking to move fashionably forward, animal prints can propel you from one year into the next without missing a beat.

Why, I’ve missed so many fashion beats I’ve lost count.

(I purchased no new clothes in 2009 except for a straw hat -- I suffered a senior’s moment or brain cramp -- that was quickly replaced by a sexier model from a flea market in Fenelon Falls. I’m planning to do the same for 2010, minus the two hats).

But while looking at the photo spread (under the heading ‘Animal Attraction’) I came to the conclusion that this week’s fashion trend (fashion trends are by the week, right?) is more about angles than animal prints.

Forgive me for saying this, but young Claudia looks like she is going for a Horatio Caine look. No animal attraction need apply, right?


["Horatio, I found a clue": original photo by M. Lamont]


["It's no clue, Claudia. It's just a dime": photo link]

And below, instead of moving fashionably forward Claudia looks like Mick Jagger strutting past the mic stand for the nth time, or maybe Elvis Costello on one of his better days.


[Copy of original photo by M. Lamont, LFP]


But then, I’m sixty, male, and my spectacles may need an update.

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Glam is just another word for...?

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