Almost 40 per cent of cellphone users in Canada have a new disorder - the missing mobile disorder. (MMD for insiders and those with sweaty palms but no cell).
Good grief! Where have I been, man?
I have ‘order disorder’ (I’d like to have a neater desk but I get distracted easily).
I have ‘the rescuer’ gene. (I see a pile of scrap lumber on the curb or boulevard. My car stops).
And I suffer from ‘short guy on defence complex.’ (I see a hockey player taller than me and I want to slash him with my stick).
But, and this is a big but, I don’t have MMD - because I don’t own a cellphone. Don’t want one. Never will.
Especially after reading the following:
“Nearly four in 10 report being overwhelmed with physical and emotional symptoms when completely disconnected." (e.g., they flushed their cell down the toilet)
“Respondents report increased heart rates, nausea and panic - and even feeling naked.” (June 7, London Free Press)
What? Nikked?
I admit, I feel the first three symptoms after I slash a big guy on the ice and he starts to chase me - but never starkers (i.e., without every last piece of my hockey gear).
I can understand that 12 per cent of Canadians have dropped their devices in a lake, ocean pool or the toilet. After all, many people are at the same time on their cellphone and close to water, sometimes standing right in it (except maybe the toilet, but I have no stats on that one), every single minute of the day and night.
But naked?
Get a grip, people.
***
I think I’ll stick to sending emails.
My gosh!!! I just dropped my computer into the loo!!
Ha! Just kidding.
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