Is my older sister trying to tell me something?

My birthday is coming up in a month, a big one as far as some people are concerned.

I say, so what. So what if I’m hitting si... six... sixt...

Hey, you know what? It doesn’t really matter because I feel like I’m 19.


["Like, how can a mess of candles be funny?"]

You know, tired in the morning, dreading the alarm and the big Psych 20 exam at 10 a.m. (B.F. Skinner - you suck, man!)

My oldest sister is hitting 65 the day after I hit ‘whatever,’ and that’s a big one, so she’ll get all the attention.

However, to prep me for the big change in my life (Say what? I’ll put my underwear on differently? Get out of town.) she’s been sending me one-liners under the following heading:

Perks of getting older.

Such as, kidnappers are not very interested in you.

And, in a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

Like, how is that funny to a si... six... teeeeee year old guy?

***

My life isn’t going to change is it? There’s no exam, right?

.